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Beauty Secrets from a 3 year-old
Published March 30, 2009 @ 17:28 in Amazing Kids

Today I decided to try a new hair conditioning treatment. You put it in your hair, then sit around for 20 minutes before washing it out. It hardens into a weird, sticky helmet, and I honestly don't think it was worth the $10.99.

I went downstairs to sit with my daughter while waiting for the 20 minutes to pass.

Daughter is cute. There is a lightness and sweetness about her. When we go anywhere, people always look at her and smile, trying to talk to her. I am not sure what is so special about her, but there seems to be something. She acts like a little pampered princess, always asking to have her hair done and her nails painted (Husband actually painted them for her this weekend - so cute!)

I sat down beside her on the couch. Daughter looked at me quizzically, then gently reached out and touched my head.

Daughter: What's that in your hair?
Me: A treatment to make it nice and pretty life yours.
Daughter: I put snot in mine.
Me: What? (I thought she said "snot," but she is three and sometimes not that clear.)
Daughter: I put snot in my hair. From my nose. Like this. (Daughter proceeds to pick her nose, and wipe it into her hair.)

Ah. Now I know never to take beauty advice form a three year-old, no matter how cute she is.

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Personality and Behaviour
Published March 30, 2009 @ 12:44 in Amazing Kids

I have three very stubborn children.

Oh - sorry - I mean determined.

A few years ago I was complaining about Son One to a friend who didn't have children, but had done some reading on the subject of child development and was therefore an expert. I was telling her that Son One was shy and stubborn.

She said, "That determination will make him very successful some day. Parents need to stop looking at personality traits in their children and evaluating them as either good or bad. Behaviour and personality are not the same thing. He is shy - a good thing because he won't ever go anywhere with a stranger. He isn't stubborn, but determined, and that will help him go far in life."

I thought a lot about what she said, and see her point. My children are all shy. This isn't good or bad, this is who they are. My mother claims that I was a painfully shy child. Some people say that my Husband is still very shy. So as the Irish saying goes, "they didn't lick that off the sidewalk."

It is challenging to me as their mother because it takes all of my children a while to get used to new situations, like swimming lessons and skating classes. The good part is that I don't have to worry about them wandering away in public as all three are usually attached somewhere, and none of them ever talk to strangers.

The stubborn gene, likely also inherited from both Husband and myself, is harder to deal with. I always thought I was stubborn, until I met my Husband. There is no one most stubborn on the planet. Son Two is in the running to dethrone him.

My children come by their determination honestly, but it doesn't make it any easier to deal with. None of them can be coerced, tricked, bribed or threatened to do anything, ever. I once had a speech therapist lecture me on how I should reward a good job on homework with a smartie. Really? You want me to bribe him to do 10 minutes of challenging work with a single smartie? Do you have children? Have you ever met a child before? I could offer to buy this kid a car to say a single word, and he wouldn't do it!

Son One, who I once thought was so challenging, in some ways is turning out to be the easiest going of three. This is only because I can, sometimes, win with him. For the other two I resort to picking them up and putting them in their rooms.

Son Two was instantly labeled, "non-compliant" by his first speech pathologist (we are on number four because he is so fun and easy to work with.) She recommended a behavioural therapist. Really? They do therapy to change personalities? At the time I said no, because Son Two is really one of the best behaved children I have ever seen.

Son Two's personality is almost identical to Husband's. The weird part is now everyone wants to diagnosis him with something. One Audiologist hinted at autism or aspergers or maybe an LD (learning disability). This was after 10 minutes because he wouldn't talk to her. He just didn't want to talk to her. The school had a speech pathologist assess him for 15 minutes and she had all sorts of crazy results.

The good news is that I think all of my kids are fine, and will be fine. I actually find them generally fairly well behaved, they are bright and successful at school and in their chosen activities. I have learned to ask before signing them up for something new, and we work a lot at home with giving them choices, so that they can feel more in control.

I am also learning to accept them for who they are. I once heard a joke about psychologists - Psychologists with one child believe in nurture; psychologists with more than one child believe in nature.

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Hungry Hungry Hippo
Published March 29, 2009 @ 19:54 in Amazing Kids

Last year the boys "borrowed" a Hungry Hungry Hippo game from their grandparents. They loved it! I think it came with 25 white plastic marbles, so with the two of them playing, someone always won.

They used to smash and grab and fight. I kept trying to put the game away, and they kept wanting it out. I have dents on my coffee table from their fun.

It is a loud, obnoxious game. I was glad when the boys had finally lost so many marbles that their tired of it.

While getting organized today, the game was unearthed. Daughter wanted to play with Mommy and Daddy. In her usual bossy fashion, she told us which hippo we could each be. We could only find three marbles, but we set the game up.

She told us when we could release our marbles into the middle. Then we started. Daddy got in trouble early for having his hippo eat my hippo's marble. Daughter took it out of his stash, and gently fed it to my hippo. Then we played again. Each hippo was allowed to eat only one marble, and if necessary, Daughter would feed them by hand.

We played a few rounds of this game, until daughter announced, "That's enough!" and put the three marbles back into a zip-lock bag, and put the game away.

Husband and I sat on the floor stunned. Who knew Hungry Hungry Hippo could be played in such a quiet, civilized fashion? Every hippo got one marble, and no one won. We were OK with it, she was OK. It just reminded me, yet again, how different she is from her brothers.

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Very green though Un-green Earth Hour
Published March 29, 2009 @ 11:20 in Amazing Kids, Being Mommy

Last year we spent our earth hour wandering around the neighbourhood enjoying the darkness.

Last night we spent it with every light on in the house, with almost every appliance working, and cleaning up vomit.

Son One started vomiting at 8:00 pm, and continued at roughly 10 minute intervals until 6 am this morning.

Between 8:30 pm and 3:30 am I did four loads of laundry - these are the "bonus" loads that I mentioned on my laundry blog. Son One went through three pairs of pajamas and had two showers. The bed was also changed.

After the first major blow-up, handled completely by Husband as I wasn't home, the rest of the night was gagging, water and bile. Husband said I would have been terrified if I had been home - probably would have called "911." He was sick starting in the downstairs entrance way, up the stairs, through the hall, and into the bathroom. Husband claimed nothing actually made it into the toilet.

Things I learned last night:

• Hot dogs take more than 7 hours to digest
• Son One needs to eat better
• Son One needs to chew his food more
• You can continue gagging for 8 hours with nothing in your stomach

I think it hurt me more than Son One to see him so sick. Though however much you love and adore your child, and however bad you feel about their suffering, part of you can still get really, really angry at 3:30 am when they miss the toilet.

I hope no one else in our house gets this stomach bug. I am not even sure it is a stomach bug - he played hockey really hard for hours yesterday, and I almost wonder if it was exhaustion / exertion. Today Son One seems to be feeling much better, but still exhausted. He has already taken a shower and bath this morning, and is back in bed.

I, too, am exhausted. I hope I get a nap this afternoon.

Last night I think we used more energy than any normal Saturday night, with the washing machine and dryer going, lights on to facilitate cleaning of many rooms, showers going, toilets flushing. Next year we'll do better, I promise!

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Mutant $3 Red Pepper!
Published March 27, 2009 @ 15:08 in Recipes

Today I decided to try a tex-mex slow cooking chicken recipe for dinner. I am pretty much guaranteed to be the only one in my house to enjoy it, but husband will eat it anyway.

It is chicken, crushed tomatoes, red kidney beans, black beans, zucchini, red pepper, corn and chili powder. Pretty simple to throw all together and let cook.

I needed black beans, zucchini and red pepper. I decided to walk to get Son Two from his morning JK as it is so nice out. I grabbed a $10 bill and daughter.

I coulda-shoulda gone to No Frills to get everything, but I wasn't sure that I would have enough time.

Daughter insisted that I get hot dog buns. I am assuming that after she and her brothers turn up their noses at my dinner, Husband will make the kids hot dogs. She also asked for Rolos as a treat. I was down to $5.30 cents entering the produce store.

This is when I realized I should have brought my wallet. I picked a zucchini, a red pepper, and a can of black beans. Then I watched as she rung up the red pepper - $2.85!!!! for one pepper.

Normally I do large, bulk, grocery shops, so I don't actually pay much attention to the price of individual items. Once I watched as produce was rung up and I returned the $6 grapes, but $3 for a red pepper? I was in too much of a hurry to argue, and I needed it for my recipe.

When I got home and started preparing dinner, I soon realized why the red pepper was $3 - it was a mutant! I cut it open to reveal light green peppers inside; globs of them. It was sort of gross and really weird. I have seen little ones before when cutting open a pepper, but nothing like this.

I shouldn't have picked this pepper in the first place - it had a tail.

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Cat Vomit ruined my socks!
Published March 27, 2009 @ 09:28 in Around the House

Husband went into work early today, so that he could come home earlier. He has been working very late this week, coming home long after we are all asleep.

This meant that I had to get everyone up, feed, dressed and out the door, while making lunches and packing bags. Not a big deal, I do it by myself every second week.

This morning, however, I had an unexpected hiccup - cat vomit.

Why do cats do this? I know Merlin is getting old, but do cats go crazy as they age? He came in this morning, meowing for his breakfast. I gave him a little food (he only eats dry). He ate it, then meowed for more. I gave him a little more, along with fresh water.

Three minutes later he threw up his entire breakfast. What is the point of eating if you are just going to throw it up? Can cats develop bulimia? He doesn't have a weight problem. Maybe he needs counseling.

Of course, as any who has a pet who vomits knows, I stepped in it. Damn! Now I had to clean my feet, as well as the floor, and get everyone out the door.

I can't decide what to do about the socks. I have them soaking for the laundry, but I am tempted to just throw them out. Really, it is not like they are my favourite socks. And though very experienced now with cleaning up some pretty nasty messes, it still sort of grosses me out.

The cat is now happily snoozing on my pillow.

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Birthday Party
Published March 26, 2009 @ 14:51 in Family and Friends

Son Two was invited to a birthday party. He is in JK, and it is one of those where the family has booked an indoor playground and invited the entire class.

He does not want to go. When I opened the envelope, I said, "Look! You are invited to a birthday party!" His response was, "I don't want to go."

Son Two has nothing against this child. He said she is nice, but he doesn't play with her. I pointed out that they would get pizza, cake and maybe even a goody-bag. He doesn't want to go.

I have given him a few days to think about it. The answer is still no. I tried to explain to him how nice it was to be invited, and how much people want to include you in their celebrations. No. I called to RSVP that he wouldn't make it.

I am not going to force my child to attend a birthday party. Husband said that the day of he will probably want to go. I'm not planning on mentioning it again. I don't feel the need to point out to Husband that the anti-social behaviour isn't from me - I have never said no to a party. Husband, on the other hand, has played in the same hockey league for twelve years, and last year was the first time that he attended the end of year banquet.

I think it is important for our kids to understand common social behaviours; however, I don't feel the need to force Son Two to attend a birthday party when he is obviously stating a lack of desire, or even a discomfort. And it saves me the $30 I would have spent on a gift.

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The National and Circumcision
Published March 25, 2009 @ 22:58 in Being Mommy

I just had to watch 50 minutes of the National to see the very brief segment on circumcision.

Obviously, our boys are 5 and 7, so we made our decision years ago, with the best information available at the time.

Currently, the Canadian Paediatric Society does not recommend the routine circumcision of new born males. The claim on the National is that they will be reviewing this policy in light of a new editorial in the New England Journal of Medicine.

This editorial is based on a study from Uganda that found 25% fewer cases of herpes and 35% less HPV amongst circumcised males.

I am so angry! What is wrong with teaching about condom usage? I know the Pope was just in Africa, and even with the high HIV rates does not want to acknowledge the potential usefulness of sex education and condoms.

But we are not a country ruled by the Pope. Although approximately 45% of Canadian are considered Catholic by our census data, we do not let the church dictate what happens in our bedrooms. I like to think we are too smart to follow everything a church, so obviously lost in the dark ages, preaches.

I attended Catholic school, and received sex education classes where we discussed STD prevention. AIDS was a huge fear, and though the school didn't hand out condoms, we were told where to get them.

I am shocked, horrified, and outraged that we would consider cutting our sons instead of educating them.

If my sons want to undergo elective circumcisions when they become sexual active in order to help decrease their chances of contracting a STD, that will be a decision between them and their doctor. We will help them research the information, and support them.

Until then my husband and I will do our best to raise our children with an understanding of our morals and values, and educate them about risks and responsibilities associated with sexual activity.

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First Robin Of Spring
Published March 25, 2009 @ 19:09 in

I just saw my first Robin of Spring 2009!

Is it really late? Or I have just been unobservant?

Either way, it's official. Spring is here!

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Names I Hate
Published March 25, 2009 @ 18:37 in Amazing Kids

Yahoo had an article about the top Canadian Baby Names of 2008. Below are the top ten girl and boy names from the article:

Girls' Names

1 Ava
2 Emma
3 Olivia
4 Chloe, Chloé, Kloé, Kloe, Cloe
5 Sarah, Sara
6 Emily, Emilee
7 Hannah, Hanna, Hana
8 Madison, Maddison, Madisyn
9 Abigail, Abigaile, Abagael, Abagail, Abbagaele, Abbagail, Abbigail, Abbigayle, Abegael
10 Sophia, Sofia

Boys' Names

1 Ethan
2 Nathan, Nathon
3 William
4 Jacob, Jakob
5 Noah
6 Samuel
7 Matthew, Mathew, Mathieu
8 Joshua, Joshau, Joshuwa
9 Benjamin
10 Alexander, Alexandre

Reading, there are some names that I am just so tired of hearing everywhere. Ethan and Aiden (#24) are my current least favourite boy's names. There always seem to be a few Ethans and Aidens around, and I just don't see the appeal.

The girls names that bother me end in an "ey" Like Hailey (#20), Avery (#30), McKenzie (#34), Noemie ?(#35), and Ashley (#70). I am also so over any girls names that are androgynous.

I remember back in high school, a girl got pregnant and had twins. She named them Storm and Raven. Even back then I knew that it was a definite sign that she not was ready to have kids choosing names like that.

People - your children will have these names for at least 18 years. This is your opportunity to do something nice for them, not to stigmatize them. I promise you that your child will not thank you for having the most unusual name in their class. Nor will it help them build character.

Husband used to randomly open the back door and yell names out when I was pregnant. He wanted to test the names out. At the time I questioned his sanity, but I see now what he was doing. He saved me from having to yell, "Storm! Don't hit Raven!" at the playground.

Yahoo Baby Names 2008

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The Better Way
Published March 25, 2009 @ 15:52 in Amazing Kids

Everyday Monday and Wednesday, Son Two and I venture downtown for some intensive speech therapy. His preference is to take the subway, so we turn it into a bit of an adventure.

This morning the Bloor / Danforth line was running a little slow due to "signaling problems" however we had left early enough that I wasn't worried.

Somehow we lucked out with a near empty train. Son Two and I sat down, and started looking at all of the ads.

Within three stops, the train was so crowded that he could no longer see the ads from his seat. Instead, he started to comment, loudly and clearly, while pointing at other passengers. If only his speech pathologist could have heard him!

Son Two: Mommy - look at that guy! The one with the hair! (It was sort of poofy, but not really remarkable enough for comment.)

Son Two: Look at that old lady! She is so slow. She can barely walk she is so old!

Me: Honey, let's look in Mommy's purse and see what we can find to play with.

Son Two: Mommy, why do you have lines on your forehead?

At least now I can smile at the "old lady," who is probably 48, 'cause now I, too, have been insulted by my cute, but vocal, son.

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Short Order Cook
Published March 24, 2009 @ 17:37 in Amazing Kids

Tonight for dinner was a short order cook. I made:

1. Grilled Cheese


2. Omelet


3. Fried Egg Sandwich


4. Chicken Fingers


5. Sushi


6. Homemade Waffles

A little ridiculous, no? And Husband isn't even home!

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A plunger?
Published March 24, 2009 @ 14:42 in Around the House, Loving Daddy

Yesterday Husband came home with a gift for me. A plunger.

Yes. Definitely makes the list of least romantic gifts you could give a spouse. I walked into the house and saw it on the stairs, and Husband says, "I got you a plunger." Thanks.

Last year we renovated and got those new, wonderful low flow toilets. We also have three children, at least two of whom can be a little frivolous with toilet paper. Because of this, at least once a week, either the upstairs or the downstairs toilet needs to be plunged.

Before yesterday, you actually had to go up or down stairs to get the plunger. Now, thanks to thoughtful and efficient Husband, each bathroom has its own plunger. (I am not exactly sure how this is a gift for me.)

He also gave me a new dust pan and brush. I swooned appropriately.

BTW - Did you know that TP is not recession proof? We knew that sales of kleenex often went down when times were tough, but sales of TP were actually down about 5.5% over last quarter.

In our house we really don't consider toilet paper a discretionary spend.

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The Sky Is Falling
Published March 23, 2009 @ 10:41 in

When we were kids, we heard stories about Chicken Little or the Boy Who Cried Wolf, and it gave us an idea that bad things happen when people lie. However, every day our kids see that adults lie, and nothing bad ever seems to happen to them.

I am getting tired of Chicken Little Obama and the sky is falling. Hey - if I was American, I would have voted for Obama. I liked him. I liked the idea of Hope. What happened? Did Bush leave a secret letter in the oval office disclosing the truth?

I bet the letter went something like this:

Hey Barack! Look, things aren't as bad as you think. They are worse. Me and my guys, well, we really f*(&%^#% up bad. But it is a secret. And now that you have taken the oath, you are stuck with it and you can't tell anyone. Not even Michelle. So good luck! Remember, when you are done you get to go on a speaking tour and you get paid more for each speech than your annual salary. There are ding-dongs and twinkies in the bottom drawer. Cheers! G W B

Yes, the States are in the middle of the largest banking crisis since the Great Depression, created entirely of their own greed. However, this isn't yet close to the worst recession since the depression.

Look, I am not an economist, though I did take Eco 020 in university, almost making me an expert (just kidding.) During the Great Depression unemployment rates rose to 24%; currently they are around 8%. In the 80's, we saw unemployment rates of 11%.

Was the depression worsened by lack of action by the American Government? Yes.

A depression is defined by real GDP declining by more that 10%. The Great Depression in the U.S. was actually two depressions - the first was from 1929 - 1933 that saw a 33% decline. WOW!

The next worse recession in the U.S. was in 1973 through 1975, which was 4.9%. Not even close.

Economists have a joke - A recession is when you neighbour loses his job; a depression is when you lose yours. Economists disagree on what causes recessions, and on how to define them. However, they do tend to be able to point to when we came out of the recession, a few quarters after the fact.

Really, job loss is no joke. It is hard on families. Adding to the current mortgage crisis in the U.S. many families are in danger of losing their homes.

With two income families, more the norm now than in the past, maybe it will help insulate more families from real struggle. I don't know for sure, I just have Eco 020. And I think I got a B.

The media, and many politicians, are running around saying that this is could be worse than the depression. Forecasting all doom and gloom - I am not sure if they want to scare us, or prepare us for the worst. I thought Obama was about hope - his campaign was optimistic. Boy, he sure changed his tune.

Sounds to me a lot like Chicken Little's claim that the sky is falling - I hope it's just an acorn. I hope you and your family are OK right now.

And I really hope that Obama and the media are wrong. But as any economist will tell you, only time will tell.

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End Of March Break
Published March 23, 2009 @ 07:53 in School

Was I the only mom who woke up super early with a special spring in her step? I didn't even need a cup of coffee (though I had one anyway.) Friday was the first official day of spring, but that wasn't the reason for my excitement. It was because today is:

BACK TO SCHOOL!

March Breaks is over, and while it has been great, I am excited about getting back into the routine. The downside is that Husband goes back to work. But the kids are back at school! YAH!!!!

Time to get those lunch bags packed. Do a little dance. Send the kids out the door...

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The Reader...
Published March 22, 2009 @ 19:05 in Being Mommy

This isn't about the movie (I haven't seen yet.) This is about me, and my ideal job. If you know of an opening, please let me know.

I want to sit in a coffee shop and read. At least 8 hours a day. And I would like to make at least $100K a year.

I am a great reader - though Husband claims that the only way I can read as fast as I do is by only reading every fifth word. This is not true, though I do classify my reads into two categories: those books which I read for the prose, savouring the language, and those which I read for the story.

Last week I picked up a book for $2 off the cheap table at Chapters. It was called, Motherhood: Three classic stories celebrating the toughest job you'll ever love.
I had hoped that it might inspire me for this blog when my own well was dry. Turns out it was some kind of erotica by Harlequin Books.

I love to read. Who doesn't? I call myself the most prolific reader ever.

Here is a list of some of my favourite books of all time (in no particular order.) All have been read at least three times to make this list:

1) Not Wanted on the Voyage, Timothy Findley

2) Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen

3) The Princess Bride, William Goldman

5) Harry Potter (all), J.K. Rowling

6) The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger

7) Anna Karenina, Leo Tolstoy

8) The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood

9) Gone with the Wind, Margaret Mitchell

10) Sunshine Sketches of a Little Town, Stephen Leacock

I am currently reading:

1) Brick Lane, Monica Ali

2) The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell

3) Barnacle Love, Anthony De Sa

For fun, I also read Sophie Kinsella, Jennifer Cruise (favourite is Faking It), and Marian Keyes.

My preference is fiction. A good love story doesn't hurt. Let me know if you find that reading job for me.

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My Butt
Published March 22, 2009 @ 18:57 in Amazing Kids

You may think that my family is obsessed with butts, given that this is my third blog that has the word, "butt" in it.

Really, I don't care about my butt. I can't see it, but it's comfortable to sit on, so why care?

I haven't heard any complaints about my butt. While I have had a few compliments, those were in my younger, pre-pregnancy days. I don't see it when I look in the mirror (except for those unfortunate times when I have used toilets with mirrors mounted above them - who does that?)

The other day I was loading the fridge with our groceries. Son Two came up behind me, and I felt him lightly put one hand on either hip. Then he stepped back. I turned around to see him standing, looking at his hands which he was holding about two feet apart.

Me: What are you doing?
Son: Just measuring your butt.
Me: Husband, stop laughing or you will be sleeping on the couch tonight.

Son Two did this completely without malice or sarcasm. For all I know it could have been learned in an estimation or measuring unit at school - you know the new math!

Son One and Husband had quite the laugh.

I think I need to start running a little more. And I am hoping that Son Two's measurement skills are a little generous - since he is a male.

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Last night's dreams
Published March 22, 2009 @ 09:17 in Amazing Kids

Last night I dreamt that I was in a really crowded building, and couldn't find the exit. No one would help me. It was terrible.

This morning Son Two came in and told me his dream. He dreamt that he and his brother were skiing down a really big hill, and they both made it to the bottom without falling. I told him about my dream.

Daughter, told us she had a dream, too.

Me: What was it about?
Daughter: My butt.
Me: What about your butt?
Daughter: It was sore.

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Laundry
Published March 21, 2009 @ 18:45 in Around the House, Being Mommy

Anyone who knows me at all, knows how much I loathe laundry.

Here are the reasons I hate it:

1) It is never done. Even if you search the entire house, do load after load, everyone gets undressed for bed and you have another pile to sort, wash, dry, fold and put away. It is endless!

2) I am bad at it. Really, I have no laundry skills to speak of. I wash clothes with lots of stuff in the pockets (kleenex is the worst, but I've washed screws, money and toys); I ruin kids t-shirts because I wash them with stickers still on, and I lose socks.

3) I have to go to the basement. I often thought if I had a laundry room on the second floor it wouldn't be so bad. But I have to walk it down two flights of stairs, and then back up again. And if your house is anything like mine, you know that there can be obstacles on the stairs not easily visible when carrying a full laundry basket.

4) Folding. I have never worked at the Gap, and never will. I could be good at folding if I was really anal about it. But I am not. It takes too long. And I don't care that much.

5) Rewashing clothes SUCKS! The kids take something out, decide not to wear it, then throw it in the hamper. I don't know, and wash it all again. This adds to my laundry bulk.

6) Sports uniforms. Try to find the right socks, jersey, ballet tights, and leotards clean on the right day, especially when you never know where they toss the uniforms when they take them off. Last summer I found Son One's T-ball uniform under my daughter's bed.

7) Socks. I always have dozens of extra socks that don't match one another. Husband has started a sock drawer - a drawer full of single socks. Once a quarter we empty this out and match them; the kids help. Unfortunately, because the hampers are never completely empty, we never get rid of the singles.

8) Daughter changes her clothes at least three times a day. And her potty training isn't perfect, but she insists on sleeping in underwear. These are bonus loads.

I can't figure out what my real issue is. Do we have too much clothing? Today's Parent recommends only doing laundry one or two days a week, so it doesn't feel like you are always doing it.

Really? We generate approximately 12 loads of laundry per week (some weeks 14). Even if I did laundry two days a week, that is still 6 loads each day!

In reality I do somewhere in the neighbourhood of 8 loads a week. This puts me 4 loads behind, or 16 loads a month that I have to make up. (I can do math, just not laundry.)

Husband used to do all of the laundry when we first lived together. This was because he worked weird hours, so when he was off, the laundry room at our apartment was usually empty. He used to go down with all of our laundry, load up all four machines, and be done in a few hours. For fun he would even take the stairs!

That was when there were two of us - and we dry-cleaned most of the work clothes. Now I don't work and I have children who wipe snot, dirty hands and faces on me. And we have three children who insist on wearing clothes (not a nudist in the bunch). Every now and then I find a load of Husband's socks, underwear and undershirts in the dryer - thanks for the help, honey!

I shouldn't complain. There are lots of people in the world who don't even have clothes, or washing machines.

Maybe we should move somewhere hot. Or to a nudist resort.

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Type B+
Published March 20, 2009 @ 17:01 in Being Mommy

I am not a type A.

Most people who know me disagree. However, I have taken the tests multiple times, and I while I sometimes get close to the type A score, I have never been anything but a B. I swear that I am not lying on the tests!

I have also taken the personality tests and have always been an introvert. Again, people who know me don't believe it, but I am sure it is true.

Today I was watching a yoga DVD (thinking of doing it). It was a little slow, so I pressed fast-forward. Surprisingly, yoga DVDs don't look all that fast on fast-forward.

Maybe I need to be retested. I think that anyone who fast-forwards a yoga DVD may actually be type A.

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Skiing with the kids
Published March 20, 2009 @ 15:14 in Kids Activities

When I was growing up, we used to ski. My parents would take us on ski vacations, but the last time I skied was before I was married, about 10 years ago.

On Monday, I skied for about 2 1/2 hours with the boys. It is Friday, and I am still sore.

Maybe I used new muscles. Maybe I am more out of shape than I thought. Or maybe I am just getting old.

Both sons did very well (and yes, they wore helmets, though husband and I didn't - next time we will.) Instead of the old rope tows and poma-lifts, they have something called a "magic carpet." This is like a moving sidewalk up the hill. AMAZING! The kids just stand there. Innovation and technology have really improved skiing for beginners.

We rented daughter some skis, but she wouldn't actually go on the hill. She walked around in her ski boots, her snow pants and pigtails looking like the cutest little ski bunny ever. But she didn't ski.

While I took my turn watching her, the boys headed up the magic carpet. Son Two fell off about a third of the way up. I watched him - I watched the operator. I wondered if I should put on my skis, or just run over in my boots to help. Then he stood up, skied to the bottom of the hill, and got back on. Aren't kids amazing?

Near the end of the day, Husband and I took the boys up the chairlift. This is why I am sore. Son One managed well with his father, getting down the blue square run with only one fall. Son Two took one looked down and panicked. First, I tried to head down with him holding my hand. But I gave up, placed him between my legs, and snowplowed down holding him up. Have I mentioned Son Two is 50 pounds? Plus equipment?

Fifteen minutes later we made it down.

Me: Husband, did you notice Son Two was having some trouble?
Husband: Yeah. Looks like he was afraid to come down.
Me: Were you thinking of coming to help us?
Husband: I knew you had in under control.
Me: Thanks.

Apres ski, we relaxed on a balcony outside the chalet. The sun was shinning. We were refreshed from the exertion. It was a wonderful day.

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Free T-Shirts
Published March 19, 2009 @ 12:20 in Loving Daddy

Have you ever received a free t-shirt? Maybe you were in a race, or attended some event, or bought a case of beer. What do you do with it? Wear it once, then pack it up for Goodwill?

I would never claim Husband is a snappy dresser. He is always clean and presentable, but his uniform of choice is a pair of jeans and a navy polo over a white t-shirt. I think he has worn this every day of his life since he learned that jogging pants weren't that cool.

In university, when we met, he wore jeans, a plaid shirt over a white t-shirt and docs. It was the uniform for most of the boys/men our age, so I didn't think anything of it.

Then metrosexuals became more popular. I bought him more fitted jeans and tight, knit tops. Luckily, it never caught on for him - those clothes stayed in his closet for years until I cleaned them out and sent them, some with tags still on, to Goodwill. It was good for me, though. I never really wanted a man who took more time with his appearance that me, and given how lazy I am, Husband works.

Except for this free t-shirt thing. He has t-shirts from university that he still wears. He wears worn out t-shirts (and socks and underwear - he throws nothing away!) Once I tried to sort them and give some away, but each t-shirt met with him commenting, "that is a good work-out shirt." My husband could work out every day for the next three months and not do laundry!

Husband does dress very well for work. Always impeccable in his suit and tie. He looks so handsome heading out the door! Of course, he changes back into jeans and t-shirt as soon as he gets home.

Last week we went to a friend's cottage. I noticed at dinner that the other couple were well dressed, though not at all flashy. Husband sat there is his t-shirt with the worn out collar, free with a case of beer. His hat, too, had been free in a case of beer. But the friends loved him - he charmed them completely.

I just shook my head. I love him, but I can't change him. My husband will never start spending money on clothes. Twice a year he has a $500 clothing allowance from work, and it is painful watching him try to spend it.

One day, when he is at work, I will clean out his closet and get rid of the worn out stuff. He'll never know. If he does notice, I'll just buy him a case of beer.

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A little appreciation - is that too much to ask?
Published March 19, 2009 @ 10:54 in Amazing Kids, Being Mommy

Do your kids appreciate everything you do for them? My guess is no. Did we truly appreciate everything our parents did for us?

We drove back from Florida with Son Two, while Son One and Daughter flew back with Nana. We had been driving for a few hours, not even out of Florida yet, when this conversation took place:

Me: So, what was your favourite part of our vacation?
Son Two: What vacation?
Daddy: The trip we were just on. In Florida? What did you like about it?
Me (thinking to myself - we went to Disney, Universal, swimming daily, air boat ride, mini golf... pick something!)
Son Two: Daddy - you know what?
Daddy: What?
Son Two: Listen to this... BUUUUURRRRPPPPP!
Daddy: Great.

Seriously - we clothe, feed and drive them around. On top of meeting their needs, we try to make life fun for them. Vacations, museum visits, skating lessons and bike rides. Is it all for nothing?

On one hand, parenting is a thankless job. Who is going to thank you for raising good kids? Not the kids, certainly.

It is one of those jobs where the joy of raising good kids should give us enough satisfaction, knowing that they love us, that they are successful and that they are contributing to the betterment of society.

But would a little thanks every now and then really be so hard?

Opps. Parents of mine - thank you very much for everything over the last 34 1/2 years. I do appreciate so much of what you did for us, the love and support you gave (except the piano lessons - couldn't we have admitted a little earlier that I wasn't musical?)
Love you guys.

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Sleepover Success
Published March 19, 2009 @ 09:55 in Family and Friends, Kids Activities

The friend had a great time last night! The boys were asleep by 10:30, which I thought wasn't too bad. Husband made them a pancake breakfast.

The guest called his parents last night before getting ready for bed, and they called again this morning to check what time they should come by. This was his first non-family sleepover, and they wanted to make sure all went well.

March Break is coming to an end. So far we have:

- gone to a cottage
- tried skiing
- gone on a Bike ride
- had sleepovers
- saw "Escape to Witch Mountain"
- played outside

I think the highlight was watching the boys try skiing.

How's your March Break been? Are you counting the hours until the kids return to school? Or are you trying to do a few more "fun" activities first?

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First Sleepover
Published March 18, 2009 @ 18:49 in Family and Friends

We have had a few family sleepovers. The kids have gone to my parents, my sisters, and Husband's parents, and we have had cousins sleep here. All have been fairly uneventful, except once when a cousin wanted to leave at 11:30 pm.

Tonight we have our first "friend" sleepover. So far so good. We have eaten pizza, and gone to the video store to pick out movies. We have decided to watch the first movie, then set up the pull-out couch and put on pajamas.

I have main rules for sleepovers - kids are always allowed to phone home, anytime, and they will be driven home on request anytime. I am sure as they grow older, the list of rules will grow longer. Right now it is a given that parents are always home, and that no alcohol will be served, but in the future this will be spelled out.

My fingers are crossed that all will go well. I am looking forward to the night when all of my kids will be at sleep-overs at friend's houses, and Husband and I can rent a movie for just us. Tonight my plan is to put on my pajamas at 9 pm and watch Being Erica. I will leave the kids to Husband to deal with.

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Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Published March 17, 2009 @ 12:35 in

My mother has a saying, "There are two kinds of people in this world: those who are Irish, and those who wish they were."

Today the world is Irish, so Happy St. Patrick's Day. We are all wearing our green, except Husband. Are you?

St. Patrick is the patron saint of Ireland (along with St. Brigid). He lived in Ireland around the first half of the fifth century, and is credited with banishing the snakes from the green isle. Really, I believe this is a metaphor as some ancient druids, the pagans, would tattoo snakes on their arms, so it is symbolic of the baptism of the country.

Years ago, when visiting the Rock of Cashel, I heard a little of the legend of St. Patrick.

In 432 AD, St. Patrick arrived in Cashel and baptized King Aengus who became Ireland's first Christian ruler. The guide on our tour explained how when the king knelt to be baptized, Patrick accidentally drove his staff into the king's foot. The peasants, thinking this was part of the ritual, decided that it would be painful to be converted to Christian and many stayed pagan.

This was also when St. Patrick, according to legend, picked a shamrock and used it to explain the Holy Trinity, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, thus creating one of the most enduring symbols of Ireland.

Wear your green today proudly. Happy St. Patrick's Day!

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SickKids Hospital
Published March 17, 2009 @ 12:32 in Amazing Kids

One thing I am very thankful for is that I live in Toronto, with arguably the best children's hospital in the world in my backyard.

I had some minor surgery there when I was twelve, and it was pretty great then. It has become even better since.

Every month I donate to SickKids. It is easy to set up, and it just comes off my credit card. I treat it almost like an insurance policy - I hope that if I do this, I may never really need their services. Quick - touch wood!

Today my niece had a minor surgery there. She is home and recovering now, and we are praying for her.

We have been to SickKids with each of our children for something.

Son One went for tests as an infant. Have I ever mentioned that he was the loudest baby ever? I am sure that the technicians have recovered by now.

Son Two was born just after SARS. When I took him I got to see some of the new protocols in action. I actually ended up meeting the Head of Infection Disease, and it turns out all he had was influenza A.

Daughter's visit to SickKids was the only disappointing experience. We were there six hours, bumped from emergency to urgent care, and left with a pamphlet on what to do when you child has a fever. Turns out they missed the white spots all over the inside of her mouth - strep throat.

I try to use our health care system properly. Urgent care for injuries. Emergency for severe, unidentified illness. Doctor or walk-in clinics for suspected infections or other minor illnesses. I stopped calling telehealth years ago when the only advice I got was to see a doctor within 24 hours if nothing changes.

SickKids is a great hospital, treating kids with all sort of wild and crazy illnesses from all around the world. It gives me a great comfort knowing how close I am to the best children's doctors, and the best treatment facilities for my kids. Thank you Sick Kids.

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Minivan?
Published March 16, 2009 @ 21:39 in Amazing Kids, Shopping and Stuff

Do you own a minivan? I swore that I would never drive one. However, while pregnant with our third child, Husband convinced me to give one a try as we couldn't afford a big SUV.

I love our minivan. We drive a Toyota Sienna LE that seats eight. First of all, it drives like a car, not a truck. It is so comfortable and easy to maneuver that I can parallel park on Bloor Street in Saturday afternoon traffic without a problem. As soon as we bought it, Husband exclaimed he would never drive anything but a Toyota. I have a feeling I will driving a Sienna until my Daughter goes away to university.

For the past three years we have had all three children, in their car and booster seats, in the middle row. It has three individual captain's chairs, but without the armrests, and having them close and easily accessible has been wonderful.

Until now. Recently, the kids have started fighting when we drive. Hitting, touching, pinching. Just bothering one another because they are too close.

Luckily, with most minivans, you have many seating configuration options. I am thinking of keeping Daughter behind the driver, removing the middle seat and placing Son Two in his booster behind the passenger, and then leaving Son One the third row, all to himself. May have Husband set that up for us this week to try out over March Break.

I have one question for minivan manufacturers - have you ever considered glass sound-proof privacy screens like on limos to pop up between the driver and the rear of the vehicle? Just a thought.

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Did you miss me?
Published March 16, 2009 @ 19:49 in Family and Friends, Kids Activities

Did you miss me? Did you notice that we were away? For the past three days, we have been at a friend's cottage. It was wonderful.

We don't own a cottage. I am starting to think that we need to make it a condition of friendship with our children - either you have a pool or own a cottage. Both would be great. (Just kidding!)

There is a boy in Son One's class who also plays hockey with him. He has WONDERFUL parents, who invited us up to their cottage for the night. I sort of extended it to two.

Their cottage is beautiful. A cabin the woods, but large and comfortable. Plus, they have a dog - really, what could be better?

The boys took a ski lesson yesterday. Today we all went skiing. Daughter just walked around in her ski boots looking like an adorable ski bunny. She didn't ski. The boys did great! I couldn't believe how quickly they both picked it up. We just did two half days.

We haven't really been invited to a cottage before. There are five of us, so I am sure it was a lot for our hosts. Also, having two families together can be tough, because you all sort of need to get along. I thought we may overwhelm they as they just have one child, but luckily, things really worked out. We had great BBQs, played charades, watched movies, walked along some trails. And there was the skiing.

Daughter wants to go back next weekend. I explained that we have to actually be invited.

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Hunting Monsters
Published March 13, 2009 @ 23:11 in Amazing Kids

My kids have come up with this new game lately - they like to go on Monster Hunts.

They have been doing it for a few weeks. I love it! They can play "Monster Hunt" together for hours - good, old fashioned, imaginative, co-operative play.

They put on backpacks and grab mini-sticks and go hunting. They slay the big monsters, but save the babies by putting them into the backpacks and bringing them home to raise at pets.

They can play this game anywhere - in the van, on vacation, in the pool, outside. At home they come up with these small little "forts" that they all cram into with pillows and blankets, like behind a chair or on the landing.

The only downside to the game is that they use the mini-sticks to "shoot" the monsters, and we are a big anti-gun family. I am also not sure where they came up with this idea of hunting, but I am not going to make an issue of it.

I love watching them play together and get along! When Son One is at school, the other two will play it all afternoon. Today was a PA Day, and the three of them played it all morning. It was great; one of the few things that they can play together equally even with their varying ages.

Another nice bonus is that they have hunted, so our house is virtually monster free, making bed time easier and no one is afraid of the dark.

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iPod
Published March 13, 2009 @ 23:03 in Shopping and Stuff

Son Two's iPod Nano broke. I am not sure how exactly - it was working, then the centre button was stuck and it wasn't.

I called the Apple Store. They advised me to book an appointment online. Sort of weird; but it worked. I arrived 12 minutes before my time, and was seen within 5 minutes by an associate at the Genius Bar (a little full of themselves at Apple, aren't they?)

After listening to my explanation, the employee tried to get it working. He asked if we synced with a Mac or PC at home. Then, when he couldn't get it working, he informed me that they don't fix iPods, just replace them.

They can look up every Apple product by the serial number. I didn't see the screen, but I am assuming that it has the purchase date and warranty information.

I left with a brand new, identical purple, iPod Nano for my son in less than 20 minutes.

Impressed by the service? Definitely. But I am little worried about the QDR of the actually product, since it was 2 months old and lightly used. Son is happy with his new iPod, so for now, all is well. Thanks Apple.

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Fertility - Natural and Assisted
Published March 13, 2009 @ 11:13 in Amazing Kids

At book club we don't just talk about the book. Last night our topics ranged from the War in Afghanistan to whether Ben Affleck was hitting the bottle before Jennifer Garner.

A topic we just touched in near the end was assisted fertility, in light of octomom in the news.

Husband and I each have two sisters, and we all have at least 2 children. When I delivered my daughter in the hospital, we were the only family in private rooms to have one child. The rest were twins, and the dads were talking about their fertility treatments in the hallway. When my sisters came to visit, one pregnant, the other with two children plus my two boys, one of the father's commented how lucky we were to be such a fertile family.

I am not sure luck had much to do with it. My sisters and I, as well as my husband's two sisters, all had our first children before our 30th birthdays. My sisters and I went to University, had careers, and got married before becoming pregnant.

I think the only way we were lucky is that we met wonderful men early enough in life. Either that or we made certain decisions. There was an article published in the Atlantic last year about making the case for marrying Mr. Right now instead of waiting for Mr. Right. It resonated with me, but that is a topic for another day.

Are there young women with fertility issues? Definitely. But I would guess that their numbers are much smaller than those of women trying to conceive after their thirtieth birthdays.

I think that our bodies, over the millennia, have developed so that the optimal decade for having children is our twenties. Yes, I know we are fertile sooner, but there is something to do with teens and lower body fats and continued growth, that actually make it not desirable.

Am I glad that options exist out there to help women have babies? Yes. I think motherhood is the greatest gift.

However I think that it needs to be more closely monitors and regulated. Shows like Jon and Kate plus 8 make a celebrity out of multiples, and deranged people like octomom want their 15 minutes of fame. Jon and Kate admit to using fertility drugs to conceive first their twins, later their sextuplets. IVF is actually a more controlled form of treatment, which is why Nadya shouldn't have been implanted with six embryos.

The numbers of assisted fertility multiples are on the rise, and it costs all of us. It is more dangerous both for the mother, and for the babies. The estimation is that the octoplets birth and hospital stay will cost the tax payers of California close to $3 million. Not to mention the long term health issues.

People desperate for children have their judgment clouded; questing for babies is so emotional it overrides logically decision making. Women are pushing for fertility drugs sooner, often lying to doctors about how long they have been trying to conceive (we are type A - used to control and not waiting for what we want.) Selective reduction is an option few, if any, parents choose, even though medically it can improve the outcomes for the surviving children.

Sometimes my Catholic roots are strong. Whatever God gives us. Whether that be many, or none. However I am prochoice - and believe strongly in a woman's right to make choices about her own fertility. See? Not black and white.

I am torn, and think we need more conversations for the sake of our children. I hope that every woman in her desire for motherhood gets that opportunity. However, I wish that we were content with one baby! All healthy births are something to celebrate. Twins, triplets and more - doesn't make you any more special, just busier, and it increases your risks.

I think fertility doctors need to put the best interest of their patients ahead of their fertility stats. Many do. However does our government have to get involved with heavier regulations? Should our health care be paying for fertility treatments? Should selective reductions over 3 embryos be mandatory? Should you have to undergo psychiatric evaluation before treatment? Lots of questions, and no right answers.

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Book Club
Published March 12, 2009 @ 22:56 in Being Mommy, Kids Activities

Tonight was another successful book club. I am home a little earlier than normal, but with March Break coming up, two of our members were away.

We had read, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows. It was generally well received by our club. Most of us are unfamiliar with our WW II history, and didn't even know that the Guernsey Islands had been occupied.

Moms out there - if you are not currently in a book club with other moms, you really need to start your own. We meet once a month, and sometimes spend most of our time talking about our husbands and kids and drinking wine. Also, these women in my group always have the most amazing selections of cheese. At home we stick with marble cheddar, so it is always and adventure.

Being the Catholic system, my children are now officially on March Break. Tonight, because they have no school in the morning, they actually waited up for me! I guess a few more years and I will be waiting up for them.

How many of you are going away for March Break? What is the plan, skiing or going south? For those of you staying home, are your kids in camps, or are you hoping to see some of what the city has to offer? Or just staying home and relaxing?

Whatever you choose do you, have a safe and happy March Break!

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Parent Teacher Interviews
Published March 12, 2009 @ 18:25 in School

You have exactly ten minutes to discuss 3 months of your child's life. Go!

I guess if you have real issues or concerns, you shouldn't wait until the twice-annual parent/teacher interview to discuss them. Really, I made the appointments so that Husband could catch up with the teachers. However, I mixed up his schedule so he was unavailable.

I see my children's teachers daily, so there were no surprises when the report cards came home earlier this week. I almost felt bad about taking up their time, but then remembered that they probably get a good perk from it thanks to collective bargaining.

The first teacher pronounced Son Two, "absolutely brilliant."

Son One was dubbed, "every teacher's dream."

See? I must be a wonderful parent. I take complete credit for my amazing children.

However, if they misbehave, they probably got that from their father.

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Don't eat that!
Published March 12, 2009 @ 16:16 in Amazing Kids, Around the House

Daughter stood in the kitchen, in her adorable ballet outfit and asked, "Am I wearing a diaper?"

Before I could say no, she peed all over the floor.

I am getting really tired of her lazy potty training ways. Some days she is great, others, she wants to wear a diaper. I don't want to fight her on it, lest I scar her for life. But it is getting ridiculous. She usually is good at peeing on the potty, but only poos once every few weeks. This morning she actually stuck her hand into her dirty diaper to "check." I made Husband clean up that one.

Took her upstairs, quick bath and change. Wiped up the pee in the kitchen. Put her clothes into the washing machine. Came back to the kitchen to wash the floor.

Son Two opened the refrigerator, and out feel his opened Twix Chocolate Bar to the floor, right where daughter had just peed.

"Don't eat that!" I yelled.

Hey - I have some standards. He was upset - he had been saving that half since Sunday. But you can't wash off a chocolate bar; I've tried.

The Pretty Princess

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Headache
Published March 12, 2009 @ 12:49 in Being Mommy

I woke at 3:30 am with a terrible headache. It felt like a really bad hangover, except that the only alcohol I've had in the past month was a glass of wine a week ago.

In the bathroom, all I could find was Children's Tylenol. Squinting in the half-light, I tried to read the recommended dosage. Multiplying my weight, trying to divide into kilograms, I came up with twelve. That can't be right, I thought.

Usually I take two extra strength tablets, which are 500 something each. The kids ones are 80, so dividing 1000 by 80 I came up with 12.5.

Not bad math for the middle of the night, eh sis? I even checked my answer before overdosing myself. I opened the bottle and there were only two left. Damn. Now I would have to go downstairs to try to find adult tylenol.

But I was too tired, and lazy. And my head really hurt. Instead I went back to bed, only to wake up this morning with the same headache. Now, four extra strength tylenols later, I am on the road to recovering.

Before kids, I never got headaches. Not even hangovers. Now, I miss an hour of two or sleep and I am thrown off for days.

Oh man! I think I must be getting older. Sucks, doesn't it?

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Winter! Please go away!
Published March 11, 2009 @ 23:23 in

Enough is enough already. Minus 17 with the windchill? I am so tired of winter! The cold. The slippery sidewalks. Snow. Ice. Cold. Wind. Grey days. Long nights. It sucks!

Not that I am any happier in the middle of July. I never claimed to be a summer person. Toronto summers are too hot and humid for me. I have asthma, so the smog makes it hard to breath. I like to run, but I am not supposed to when the humidex reaches 30.

Winter is just as bad. It is dangerous and slippery, and the cold can set off an asthma attack as well. Shoveling snow once every few weeks is OK, but any more often sucks. And where to park in the city with snow banks larger than the SUVs?

What to do, what to do.

Any ideas on nice, temperate climates? I want a city with no snow, but pleasant skiing somewhere nearby. Sun is good, but no smog or humidity: and I want a nice hot beach a few hours drive away. I am actually thinking Paris, but it is dirty and French.

My other big considerations are bugs and vermin. Don't like 'em. Raccoon, alligators, mosquitoes, spiders - anything that bites, has the potential to bite, or makes a mess.

I like ethnic food, and I will need diverse cuisine (at least good Indian, Italian, Thai and Sushi). I also like to shop, need good doctors and hospitals, good public transport and schools (assuming I bring the kids). Housing prices should be reasonable, since I likely won't be working.

If I bring the kids to live with me, I will also need sporting facilities, dance studios, and other child friendly entertainment.

Please, if you know of a city anywhere in the world that meets my criteria, let me know!

In the meantime, I may just stay inside for another few weeks. At least until my tree buds and my lawn is free of snow and ice.

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Report Cards
Published March 11, 2009 @ 12:09 in School

This week we received report cards. This is my second grade one report card, with As, Bs, Cs, etc. Kindergarten just get columns of check-marks.

Am I the only one who thinks that these report cards are crazy? Are they written in a foreign language? Who is supposed to decipher this information?

Luckily, I have a sister and a few friends who are teachers to help me out. Apparently, getting a B now is like what our As were - except some teachers are more oldschool with marks while others are by the book (can't help these puns!) So while the new report cards were meant to help standardize assessments, there is still a lot of interpretation.

What ever happened to the comment, "Johnny is a pleasure to teach"?

In Kindergarten, the reports have three columns: beginning to develop toward expectations; developing toward the expectation; and, meeting the expectation. I guess in Kindergarten there is no option of exceeding expectations!

My advice for parents who are new to this report card time like me:

1) Wait until you are home to open and read the report card. The playground is not the place.

2) Don't let you children see you cry when you read it. It will likely make them feel bad.

3) Only read them the good parts, and don't tell them how many As, Bs, etc. they received. All the kids show up the day after they get their grades and compare. Try to discourage this.

4) Understand that the teachers need to put three goals for your child, no matter how wonderful your child is.

5) Don't talk to other parents to compare. They may lie.

6) Take a deep breath, and try to see the honesty behind what the teacher is saying. If there is an area that needs to be addressed, better to deal with it than to put on blinders. That won't help your child.

7) Don't offer rewards. Encourage them to do well because they feel good about their successes.

8) Acknowledge that your child may behave differently at school than at home. Ideally, they behave better at home, but that is not always the case.

9) Give them a big hug and a kiss, and tell them how proud of them you are.

10) Save the report card.

Next, prepare for the parent - teacher interview.

1) Educate yourself as much as possible, like checking out Ministry websites, to see what standards are.

2) You and the teacher are team, working together to get the best education possible for your child. Ask how you can support their learning at home. Ask to see comparisons of your child's work, and better work.

3) You are your child's best advocate.

4) You know your child best.

5) The teacher has no hidden agenda, and no reason to lie to you about your child.

Finally, try not to cry in the interview. It can make the teacher very uncomfortable.

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Becoming a Mother
Published March 10, 2009 @ 07:40 in Being Mommy

Seven years ago right now I was lying in a hospital bed crying.

My water had broken 27 hours earlier, and I was at 4.5 cm. The baby wasn't coming down and was sometimes in distress. I had just thrown up the bile from my empty stomach. I hadn't slept since I went to bed on Friday night and woke up with my water breaking. It was Sunday morning, and I wasn't sure how much more I could take.

My husband left to grab breakfast at McDonalds. Then the nurse came in and informed me that the doctors decided I would need a c-section. When she realized Husband was gone, she said we could wait for him, as long as the baby was OK.

I asked if I could have a gingerale with ice when it was all over. She said of course. I also asked if I needed to be shaved, "down there." She said no. I was exhausted - those were really the only thoughts going through my mind.

When Husband came back, so did my OB, a resident, a medical student, an anaesthetist, and my nurse. They were ready. Husband dressed in scrubs.

They wheeled my into a OR and within minutes delivered a baby boy. 9 lbs 2 oz. He was beautiful. Absolutely perfect. I cried. I was exhausted. I was thrilled. I was a mommy.

Seven years ago today I started this journey into Motherhood. You can't find the words to describe what it means to be a mother, how it changes your life until you first forget who you are, then realize that it doesn't matter because you are someone new.

You understand why mother bears do everything to protect their cubs. You cry when someone looks at your child the wrong way. When you realize that your child is less than perfect, it breaks your heart.

Today is my son's seventh birthday. I can't believe I have a seven-year-old! Really, I look much too young. But here it is. Seven years of bliss, dotted with agonizing moments of pain. I love you, Birthday Boy. Happy Birthday!

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Driving with Husband
Published March 9, 2009 @ 14:51 in Loving Daddy

They say opposites attract, and husband and I are very different. He is hard and muscular, I am soft and round. He is tall, I am short. He is quiet, I am loud.

But there are other, less obviously differences. Early in our marriage, when we fought over in-laws, I would often call his family passive-aggressive.

His response was always the same, "Yeah, well yours is aggressive-aggressive." Touche.

I grew up in a family where you yelled because you loved. We are still louder and more vocal than my Husband's family, but we also talk about everything and know where everyone stands on every issue. His family is very pleasant to be around, but for someone like me, it is sometimes hard to know when to mind my own business.

Driving home from Florida, our differences were highlighted.

I treat driving like a sport. GPS encourages that, with a checkered flag at the destination. I may not know much about racing, but I know what the checkered flag means.

When I see a vehicle up ahead, I speed up to pass. I hate being passed.

Husband actually drove behind a winnebago for 20 minutes.

My speed of travel was between 120 km/hr and 135 km/hr.

Husband traveled at 100 - 120.

Husband is an excellent driver. Really, the best driver I have ever seen. His personality is such that he is never in a hurry. He is relaxed, laid back, and easy going.

Now, I am no type-A. Really I'm not. But did I mention that we were opposites?

A WINNEBAGO!

At one point during our trip, I got mad at the GPS.

Me: "She doesn't give you much notice about the turns, does she?" (Note: we always refer to the GPS as a woman. I would love to change it to a man's voice, just so we could curse him every now and then.)
Husband: "She assumes that you are driving the speed limit, not Mach 2."

The good news is, we made it home safe and sound. And we've been together long enough to treasure our differences, not to fight over them.

But come on. A WINNEBAGO!

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My Daughter, the Princess
Published March 9, 2009 @ 14:19 in Amazing Kids

Before I had children, I had this vision that I would raise a strong, independent girl without any gender stereotyping.

I was going to name my daughter Jordan, a strong, androgynous name, and she would share my last name. She would wear bold colours, blues, greens and reds. She would attend sport camps, and play with cars and trucks. She would never wear a dress, have pigtails, or play with dolls.

Really, I wanted to raise my daughter as much as a boy as possible, so that she would truly be outside of traditional gender roles.

First came Son One. I don't know why, but my strong feminist ideals are mixed with strong romantic values. I wasn't going to raise a boy at all like a girl. Son One got a completely boy name. He wore blue; though he has the most beautiful blue eyes so blue was really the only choice. He had cars and trucks. He was big and tough, and we played into that for him. He was athletic, and we encouraged it.

Then came Son Two. Blue for his blue eyes, too. Strong male name. Car, trucks, balls and blocks. Again, we encouraged his athleticism, and even encouraged him to stick up to his big brother.

I was pregnant again. I wanted a healthy baby, but also sort of wanted a daughter. Husband really wanted a girl - all of his friends had girls, why couldn't we?

We got our daughter. We named her a nice, soft, feminine name from the Old Testament. She wore pink for her entire first year of life, except for one pretty lavender outfit she wore a few times.

Daughter has long hair we have never cut. She loves her babies (aka dolls). She wears skirts and dresses all of the time, or sometimes just tights. She does gymnastics and ballet. She wears a tiara for fun. A complete girly-girl.

And here is the worst part. I call her, "Princess."

Did you ever hear the joke about the little boy's first day of school?

Mother, "What did you learn you first day of school?"
Son, "Well first of all, I learned my name is Henry, not Precious."

If you ask Daughter her name, she will either tell you is it, "Big Girl" or "Princess."

Her brothers have pointed out to her that she isn't really a princess because she doesn't live in a castle.

I don't know what happened to my plans. I am still a feminist, though a stay-at-home-taking-money-from-my-husband-because-I-have-no-job kind of feminist. My daughter wears only pink, walks around on her tip-toes, and I call her Princess.

The good news is, with two older brothers, she really does learn to stand up for herself. And my husband and I have a completely equal relationship, even with the traditional roles we currently play.

Even if she is a bit of a princess, she is more like the Paper Bag Princess than Sleeping Beauty.

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Driving with Son Two
Published March 9, 2009 @ 14:00 in Amazing Kids

21 1/2 hours in a van. 2060 km. Orlando to Toronto.

Son Two was AMAZING!

He asked, "When are we going to be home?" only 6 times - and it was between noon and 3 pm yesterday.

Saturday morning we left at 7:30 am. Son Two watched 5 movies before we stopped for the night:

1. Cars
2. Transformers
lunch
3. Harry Potter and the Socerer's Stone
4. El Dorado
dinner
5. Sponge Bob

Son Two is like a camel. He pees in the morning, at night before bed, and sometimes in the afternoon. He sat in the back of the van with his movies, his DS, and loaf of Italian bread, a box of Mini Wheats, and two bottles of water. That is all that it took to keep him happy for 20 hours!

We stopped for the night at a hotel with an indoor pool. Husband and Son Two swam until the pool closed. Unfortunately, with the time change, we were exhausted and found it really hard to get going Sunday morning.

We left at 9:40 am, and arrived home at 6 pm.

Meanwhile, Nana flew home Saturday night with Daughter and Son One.

Everyone was happy.

Husband and I were very surprised - if the weather is nice, the drive is actually very good. Especially if you have children like Son Two, who are great travelers.

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Talking to Americans
Published March 6, 2009 @ 17:25 in Shopping and Stuff

There is no logic in this country. I swear people here are so lazy that they don't even bother to think.

Outlet shopping

You get these coupon books by showing you CAA card (or triple A). However, the girl was hell bent on trying to find out if my mother and I were related by blood. I don't generally feel the need to share information with people I don't know, but my mother-in-law was with us and she likes to share.

Why do they need to know? Well, then we don't each get a coupon book.

My mother and father, who have the same name, live in the same house, and pay one CAA fee, can each get their own because they are not related by blood.

My mother and I, with different last names, different addresses, and who each pay our own fees, need to share.

Logical? (OK, in all honesty, I don't have a CAA membership and had borrowed my sister's card to get the free booklet. I kept my name, but she didn't. So my alias was different than my mother's surname.)

At the Gap my mother was buying a T-shirt.

"Zip Code?" the employee asked.

"Oh, I don't live in the states." my mother answered.

"Really? You must practice your English a lot. You speak very well."

"I live in Canada."

Do Americans really think that they are the only country in the world that speaks English? What about ENGLAND?

At Victoria's Secret I couldn't find anything. Their outlets are awful!

As I checked out, the sales girls asked, "did you find everything you were looking for?"

"Actually, no," I answered.

"Oh."

She actually had no response. Obviously, she cared about as much as the Walmart employee, who when listening to my customer concerns, informed me that he was feeling sick. Was I supposed to care?

I am tired of the assumptions that Canada is a frozen tundra. I am tired of the fake, "have a nice days" and the really unhelpful service. I just want to go home.

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Going Home
Published March 6, 2009 @ 17:16 in Being Mommy

The vacation is over. Today we are packing up, and leaving tomorrow. The lucky ones are flying home from Florida - will take them about 7 hours door to door with airport waits and suck. The other three of us are driving.

Yes, I will leave Florida tomorrow morning, I hope by 8 am, and drive home to Toronto. We will stop somewhere overnight, and I definitely won't be in contact until Monday. Try not to miss me too much!

We are still debating the route. I am not sure why - Husband has already made up his mind and no one is changing it. I think he just wants me to disagree with him so that he can be right. So far, I haven't been taking the bait.

24 hours in the van with Husband and Son Two. I read my last book today, so it means I will have to talk to Husband on the way home. Plus we are taking the mountain route home so the radio won't be working. Son Two has a DVD player with movies picked out, a Nintendo DS, books and snacks.

I am tired just thinking about it. And I know it is all in my head, but I have been going to the bathroom every twenty minutes today just because I can.

The packing isn't done. I promised the kids that they could each pick out a treat for trip home tomorrow. And of course, we had the most beautiful day yet today, so I am not sunburned!

Can you tell I can't wait to get home?

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I dressed myself
Published March 4, 2009 @ 18:02 in Amazing Kids

Do your kids dress themselves?

My Daughter does. She is the one who needs the button that says, "Today I dressed myself." One day she wore stripped tights and a tank top with a pink shoelace tied around her waist. This was January, and we were at the arena. At least her outfit was so extreme that no one would assume that I actually picked her clothes out for her. Husband thinks that she may become a real fashionista. We'll see.

Son Two has been dressing himself since he was three. Sometimes my husband picks out his clothes, and he'll be wearing stripes and camouflage, or black, brown and navy. For those days I wish we had a button that says, "Today my Daddy dressed me."

Son One is becoming a problem. He will be seven in a few days. And I still dress him.

No, I don't mean that I still pick out his clothes. I mean that I physically dress him. I pull his shirt over his head. I pull up his pants and pull on his socks.

He will be seven next week. He is completely capable of dressing himself. He is lazy. And likes the attention. One day, probably sooner that later, he won't want me to dress him.

Either that or I will be camping out on his university residence floor and picking out his clothes for his dates.

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Jason the Bachelor
Published March 3, 2009 @ 19:42 in Amazing Kids

I watched most of the first season of The Bachelor, but haven't really watched much since. Really, the idea of the show turns my stomach. 25 beautiful women vying for a marriage proposal from a single man. I never figured out why any of the bachelors were actually so great that they would deserve this (back in university with used to joke about the girls only there to find a husband, how they were looking for the MRS degree.)

Then, it was failed engagement after failed engagement. It seemed that the scripted romance of the show never translated into real life.

The only successful relationship is Trista - the first bachelorette. Obviously, while women are successful with choosing a mate for themselves, men are hopeless idiots. Unfortunately, it seems like reality TV finds beautiful, but very dumb people.

Jason is the just the latest idiot bachelor to prove that this show should be taken off the air. Really - who is watching these shows? Molly - if you have any brain or self-preservation instinct - run as fast as you can in the opposite direction!

On a deeper level, how do I raise my daughter not to put up with the ridiculous crap just to have a man? I hope when I watch her fight with her brothers that she is going to develop enough of a backbone to stick up for herself.

I want her to learn self worth - that she is someone without a boyfriend. I want my daughter to have confidence and self-esteem. She is smart, she is beautiful and she can do anything she wants.

It really, really bothers me to see women competing for marriage like it is the only desirable prize in life, especially as most of these men end up being a booby prize. I feel like we are going backwards in the women's movement. Focusing more on what we look like, and less on who we are; making more important to land a man before we turn thirty, and less important as to what we can accomplish in our lives.

Unfortunately, the media doesn't give me much support as a mother trying to raise a strong, independent feminist daughter. Between the bachelor, Rhianna, octomom, I really worry for my Daughter's future. How can she grow up in this world with such screwed up values and be OK?

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Do you miss your Mommy?
Published March 3, 2009 @ 18:39 in Being Mommy, Shopping and Stuff

Today Daddy took the boys to Universal Islands of Adventure. Later they are supposed to be staying over night with my in-laws. I haven't heard from them yet, so everything must be going OK.

I got to do some shopping, and it was great today. A Gap employee has restored my faith in American retail employees. He searched the entire store for something, held open the bathroom door for my daughter, and looked all around the store for me when I left my sunglasses in the change room - what a guy!

But I miss my boys. I know it has only been about 8 hours, but I miss them. The world seems so quiet, and I have this weird sort of freedom. Except that I have forgotten what it is like to do what I want.

I used to be incredibly decisive. Today I couldn't even decide what I wanted to eat for lunch (the good news is that I just ate Daughter's as she changed her mind.) Actually, it worked out well because it turns out she didn't want the pizza for dinner either, so I had two meals that I didn't have to think about.

A break from the kids is nice. I can relax and be myself again, and appreciate the kids for who they are. I hope the boys miss me, too.

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Shopping... not so great
Published March 2, 2009 @ 18:09 in Shopping and Stuff

Shopping was OK, though I got nothing for myself.

I went to the Premier Outlets. Daughter got a pair of pink running shoes from Geox, and the boys each got Converse All Stars, all three pairs for less than $60 total! I also bought some clothes for a friend who just had a baby. I spent less than $83 total.

Kids are now at the age where all of them really have to be present when I purchase something for them, or they may not like it.

Nana bought two dresses for Daughter. She was awake for the first, but had fallen asleep in the stroller for the second. I loved it. Daughter was not as impressed.

"That is not my dress."

"Yes, Nana bought one for you and one for your cousin."

"But I hate it!"

With Daughter, you can usually convince her to wear something if it was purchased by her Nana, and her cousin has the same one. I really hope that we can get her into the dress.

Honestly, the shopping is not that great. I don't know if it is because we are at the outlets, and they assume that tourists are doing the shopping so we are dumb enough just to buy it because it is the outlet.

There was a Tod's outlet; it was disgusting. The purses started at over $350, but the outlet was dirty and grubby looking, with really poor selection.

Coach was a mad house. Some of the purses there were nice, but the ones that I really liked were still over $200.

Tomorrow I am going to try the Prime Outlets. They seem to have the same stores, but we'll see what the prices look like there.

Still staying away from Walmart. Though there is something called "Bells" here that I may check out, along with Kohls.

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A cold day in Florida
Published March 2, 2009 @ 11:22 in

It is cold out there today. OK, it is too cold to swim, but not as cold as Toronto. So I guess we are still ahead.

This morning I had the kids do some of their school work. We brought a little and I would like them to get it done. I don't love the idea of taking them out of school, so I want to at least try to be responsible.

What to do with three kids when it is too cold to just play in the pool? My personal activity of choice on a day like today is shopping. And they have so many places to go. Prime Outlets, Premium Outlets. I will let you know the different when we get home.

I know, the economy sucks and I shouldn't be shopping. Especially since I have been unemployed for over seven years. The exchange rate isn't great. And I don't really need anything new, considering I probably have too much stuff already.

But what else can we do? It seems like here in Orlando you can either spend $1000 at Disney, or go shopping. And I am betting that I will spend less than $1000 shopping today.

I can tell you one thing for sure. I am NOT going back to Walmart.

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Walmart Sucks
Published March 1, 2009 @ 19:18 in Shopping and Stuff

I was going to title this post, "Americans are fat and stupid" but my husband says I shouldn't speak in absolutes, so really, it should be that most Americans are fat and stupid.

This is not the greatest country in the world. I used to think that Americans were generally very ignorant, however they are also rude and obnoxious.

I just had the WORST check out experience ever at a Walmart. Almost half an hour to check out. When I suggested to another employee, who had tried to help our incredibly clueless checkout girl, that maybe she needs more training or support, his only response was, "I'm sick."

At that point I asked if there was a manager I could speak with.

There is a self entitlement and self importance to the American culture. If Obama wants to fix his country, he has got to stop blowing sunshine up their asses, and be frank and honest with them.

1. Stop eating so much crap. The food here is crap. All processed garbage. You are what you eat, and you guys are eating crap.

2. Stop watching TV. Your news SUCKS. No wonder you don't know that Everest is in Asia and not Africa. Go ahead, try to find Iraq or Afghanistan on a map.

3. Stop the fakeness. The hair, the nails, the tans, the "have a nice days". You don't really care about anyone but yourself, so stop pretending that you do. And the fake nails and hair - do they only sell one colour of blond hair dye here?

4. Stop the rudeness. You are no better than the person standing beside you, so there is no reason why you deserve to go first. Wait you turn. Better yet, consider actually letting someone in front.

5. Stop buying and selling so much crap! There is junk everywhere. You don't need it. Try the three Rs - reduce, reuse, recycle. Really come on - you don't recycle?

OK, so it won't fix you, but it would be a start. Honestly, you are turning your country into a garbage can. It is like you country has become a giant Walmart nation, and it really sucks.

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Fighting Irish
Published March 1, 2009 @ 09:37 in Family and Friends, My Rules

What do you do about kids who fight?

It frustrates me so much that I want to get in the scrum and knock them all down.

It always starts out so innocently. Standing close to one another, someone's foot swinging back and forth with a little too much enthusiasm.

"Mommy! He kicked me."

What is it about siblings? Is it an expression of love? Trying out their limits with the safety of family members? Watch any litter and you see nipping, rolling wrestling. It all seems to be about developing the social order.

My Husband told me about a friend of his who faught with his brothers on the front lawn and had his mother turn the hose on them. I can't figure out if it is funny or embarassing.

So do we let them go at it and hope that no one gets injured? Is it a rite of passage that we should let them go through to learn how to work things out?

Or should we lay down the law and discipline those who step out of line?

I am confused. All I know is that I am still bigger than all of them, and could take them if I had to.

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