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I remember being in that predictament. I am curious.....how was the other mother while her son was being socially inappropriate? I think that would be one of the deciding factors if we return or not. If she was productively trying to stop this type of behavior then I would return. You are so right when you say "Kids need other kids to help learn the rules of how to treat one another." If the mother did not acknowlege this behavior with appropriate means then I would start rehearsing some excuses. Keep us posted.

Jesus would forgive and forget and then stay away from child....at least until the behaviour was corrected...I think your child said it he does not want to return. Why would you force your son into a situation that you did not want him in. If the parent was and did try to correct the behaviours of the her child she should also know that she should be exposing him to other children on a day to day basis. If he is not exposed to this behaviour then where did he learn it. Yes, children will be children but my son until age 5(when he went to school) was not really around other kids but when he was he did not bite them, nor push, nor slap or even push their head into the wall. He was taught not to do that and that was that. For myself I would look into the family situation is there older kids, are the parents getting along, is this child exposed to social situations?????

I think Stacy and Jill are right. We will be not have anymore playdates with this family for a while. The mother was a little of, "Gee, those boys are rough!" kind of response. However, knowing my son, he is not violent. I guess that is the difference; while I am aware that rough-housing occurs, violence and aggression are a whole other ball of wax. And something that it is not right to subject my children to.
There are two other children in the family, but they are younger and were fine. Now I need advice on the avoidance of playdates, especially with someone who lives very near by.

I think at 5 yrs old children should already know that it is inappropriate to bite and hit. I have two boys too and even though they play rough and pretend to fight they have enough self control not to actually hit each other.

Btw, if this mother reads your blog, there may not be a need for avoidance anyway.

I agree with everyone, but I guess I really have to wonder what the mother thinks and whether she really believes this is socially acceptable behaviour? Aggression towards any child at any age should not be tolerated. It is not the fault of the five year old who is home schooled and still using this behaviour since he's not being corrected and clearly in need of socialiazation that a 2 hour 'playdate' every now and then is NOT going to address or correct. School is free. Choose the public or the Catholic system, get in there and get the child under the watchful eye of people educated in this field.

Let's hope she reads it!

I wish I could call her today and say, "look, this is what your son did. This is why my son doesn't want to have anymore playdates. What do you think?" But I am a big chicken! Neither she nor I witnessed the behaviour, but both of my sons were pretty specific about what happened and her son did not dispute their accounts. He did apologize a few times.

Maybe if she calls I will say, "Look. Son Two doesn't want to come back. He was bit, slapped, and had his head knocked into the wall."